Kim Kardashian -- Tannerite of the Celebrity Field


Kim Kardashian is famous for being famous.  She has nothing going for her.  She is not particularly beautiful.  She is not talented in any way (that I know of -- who knows, she may be an expert at the Venus Butterfly in the bedroom, but that isn't probable).  She had a short marriage.  She hooked up with fellow goofball Kanye West and had a baby called North West.  Kanye himself is a loose cannon that is mostly brainless and never met a Mike that he didn't like.  But mix Kardashian and West, and you have the tannerite of the micro-celebrity field.

What's tannerite?  In case you haven't been following the news, tannerite is that stuff that is taking the shooting world by storm.  It is two inert powders -- ammonium nitrate and aluminum powder.  Mix them together and shoot at it, and it explodes.  If you go to YouTube, you can see everything from watermelons to dump trucks being blown to smithereens by tannerite.

So other than the fact that you have two brainless, no-talent celebs with too much money doing goofball things, why is Kardashian like tannerite?  It is because she has the mark of 666 on her, the famous LST syndrome.  LST or Longer Second Toe is called Morton's Toe, LeMay Toe, Morton's Syndrome, Greek Toe, brachymetatarsia, Metatarsus atavicus, Greek foot, or as the French call it, pied de Néanderthal -- the foot of the Neanderthal.  Scientist say that it is an atavism or a genetic throwback or recursion to our monkey roots, recalling prehuman grasping toes.  Kim Kardashian has monkey toes.

My grandmother, (God bless her soul), knew all of the signs and portents that Nature has.  She was from Bohemia, and learned this ancient wisdom that was handed down.  Some may call it superstitions, but according to her, it was back luck to be superstitious.  It was just fact.  I was told by my grandmother to avoid women with Monkey Toe or LST, because they were crazy bitches.  Hence the tannerite aspect of Kim Kardashian.

I am predicting that the union of West and Kardashian will not survive, because West is plain batshit crazy and Kardashian (according to the LST theory) is a bitch.  So stay tuned, and make some popcorn.  It should be a good show.

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