Grow Your Own Meat -- Lab Meat

Back in the 1980's a popular kitchen appliance was a home yogurt maker. They were blue plastic things with an array of cups that you plugged into the wall and it rotted the milk to make yogurt. Your can buy these machines used at yard sales for a dollar or less.

In our brave new future, the home yogurt maker will be replaced with the home meat maker. That's right. We will have meat grown in a laboratory environment. Lab meat. It will save all the muss and fuss of having a real animal with its pooping, mooing, smells and unsanitary space. Instead of filet mignon, we will have filet au flask. Instead of pig-in-a-poke, we will have pig-in-a-petri dish.

Growing meat in a lab is especially efficient. You don't have to waste energy and food to grow the bits that we can't use like hooves and udders and horns and lips and such. We get the prime cuts from flask to grill.

PETA, the animal activists have offered a $1,000,000 dollar reward to the first person that comes us with a viable process to grow meat in the lab. I think that I will raid the kitchen for equipment and go out and try to find a cow somewhere.

No comments: