Eliminating Man Boobs

Now that Viagra has taken care of the first major problem that a man faces when aging, the second one will become a goldmine for whoever solves it with pharmaceuticals. I am talking about the scourge of man boobs.

In the Seinfeld show, Cosmo Kraemer invents a bra for men that he calls the bro. This invention would be obviated by a new spray invention that shrinks man boobs. As men age and put on weight, they start to get breasts and unless you are prepared to spend every other waking hour in the gym, they are difficult to get rid of. The answer is a spray just like Oil of Olay.

Women have their wrinkle cream. We men will have our man boob spray. There is only one caution. If you carry it on your person in public, you may be charged with assault with a deadly weapon. After all, this is a boob eliminator and there are a lot of boobs out there.

The Modern Shoe

The modern shoe really isn't modern. Sure we have Air Jordan, and the latest Nike Shoe incarnations made with space age material and such. We also have the weight loss shoes, and a different shoe for every sport. But when you come to think of it, the shoe in its overall form hasn't changed that much.

The shoemakers of old took a pencil and a piece of paper, traced your foot, and made an enclosure for it. This enclosure has been enhanced with wheels, springs, air bags, flashing lights, rockers and what not, but mechanical function has not changed.

There are twenty muscles and twenty-eight bones in the human foot. The shoe of the future will be designed to react according with the entire set. There will be micro-machines embedded to relieve stress on the downstep, and recover energy on the upstep. The recovered energy could power the microprocessors inside the shoe running the show. In other words, the shoe will become as dynamic as the foot inside of it. Gone are the days when unyielding shoes will cause blisters.

There is only one problem that will arise with the modern shoe. Muslim extremist will find it easier to wire bombs into them, or make them better weapons for throwing at American presidents. Perhaps they will be made to go in planes in bare feet. It will go with their Stone Age views on religion.

Internet Connected Apparel

Imagine having your ball cap connected to the internet. The GPS component would guide you to a bar to meet your friends, and you would impress your girlfriend by not getting lost or having to stop to ask for directions (although from the amount of jokes on the internet, it seems that women value the ability in a man to stop and ask for directions).

An internet connected hat would really help to google for a really good pickup line when you meet a girl --(eg "Hey Baby, can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?"). You could also use it to keep track of the baseball score in places like a church or at a funeral.

An internet-connected hat means that you wouldn't need to bother carrying an iPod. You would just upload your playlist and take it from online. The hat would have a solar panel to recharge the battery, so you wouldn't have to worry about recharging, because it would always be recharging.

The best thing about an internet connect hat is that it appears to make you look smart, and you can let it go to your head.

The Smart Diaper

Last night I was having a discussion with a friend about whether we would choose to become a parent again. Parenting is hard work and it never ends. It goes on for years. Of one thing that you can be certain, is that technology will help.

One of the things that I foresee, is the smart diaper or diagnostic diaper. We have at-home diagnostics in many things. Women pee on a stick to see if the rabbit dies and they are pregnant. Diabetics test their own blood at home. It makes sense for a company like Pampers to gain the market edge by creating a diagnostic diaper.

The smart diaper would analyse the things that it has readily available. These would be pee, poop and temperature. Not only would the diaper notify you when it needs changing, it will also give you a running analysis of the contents of the diaper.

The biggest invention in diaper technology that I am waiting for, is an odor neutralizer. Now that would be a huge boon to mankind.

Grow Your Own Meat -- Lab Meat

Back in the 1980's a popular kitchen appliance was a home yogurt maker. They were blue plastic things with an array of cups that you plugged into the wall and it rotted the milk to make yogurt. Your can buy these machines used at yard sales for a dollar or less.

In our brave new future, the home yogurt maker will be replaced with the home meat maker. That's right. We will have meat grown in a laboratory environment. Lab meat. It will save all the muss and fuss of having a real animal with its pooping, mooing, smells and unsanitary space. Instead of filet mignon, we will have filet au flask. Instead of pig-in-a-poke, we will have pig-in-a-petri dish.

Growing meat in a lab is especially efficient. You don't have to waste energy and food to grow the bits that we can't use like hooves and udders and horns and lips and such. We get the prime cuts from flask to grill.

PETA, the animal activists have offered a $1,000,000 dollar reward to the first person that comes us with a viable process to grow meat in the lab. I think that I will raid the kitchen for equipment and go out and try to find a cow somewhere.

Get Water

We as humans are composed mostly of water and we need it to survive. More importantly, we need it to live. We wash our hair, brush our teeth, cook our noodles, boil our cabbage and do many many things with water without even thinking about it. That is about to change.

Already a good part of the world faces water issues. Here in the tropics, water on this island comes from a hellishly expensive reverse osmosis system that uses a lot of energy, or it is barged in from natural lenses of fresh water from another island. This is unsustainable, especially with the population growth of people migrating to the capital city to look for jobs and improve their way of life.

So how are we going to resolve this water issue? Simple. Using technology. The way that the astronauts do. The only answer is to recycle water.

I would imagine that each house would have a water recycler just like a furnace. All of the drains lead to the recycler. When you boil your noodles, and dump the water down to the recycler, it comes back pure and clean without the salt. When you have a pee, it comes out a pure drinking water. The astronauts now drink the water from their pee after it has been purified.

It will even go further than that. There will be machines to take the humidity out of the air and turn it into drinking water. Water will be caught and recycled from clothes dryers. Water will become so valuable, that it will be worthwhile to process it from wherever we find it. This will be good news for the Scotsman who will go green by drinking his Scotch straight, instead of adding water to it.

Genetically Modified Pets

As we humans, and particularly scientists get more comfortable with this DNA thing and genetically modifying plants, our attention will turn to the family pet. After all, it isn't such a big ethical disaster if a DNA experiment turns out horribly wrong whilst working on the family cat.

Take the family cat. It needs vast improvement. It now longer needs to hunt, so the claws can go. I'm willing to bet that a scratchless cat is worth a few million to its inventor. Then you turn your attention to flea resistance. Fleas bite and eat the cat's blood. The future cat would have genetically modified bloody that is stinky to fleas and they would find it repulsive. The cat would no longer have fleas. Just have lots of Febreeze around if the cat cuts itself, but it is a small price to pay to get rid of pestilence.

The next step is to prevent shedding. Cat hairs will be genetically modified to wither and crumble into dust from the top down. Instead of cat hair clinging to everything, a quick pass with the Swiffer gets the floor clean.

And finally, we will cure the "aloofness" gene in cats and transplant the dog "friendly" gene. The cat will be waiting at the door, ready to greet you as you come home from work. It will jump up on you, but it won't scratch or shed. It will be the perfect pet. It will supplant the dog as man's best friend. That would be a dog-gone shame.

The New Music -- Non Auditory

I had arrived in Nassau last night and after a long day of airports, I turned on the TV to watch the Discovery Channel. A professor from Laurentian University was demonstrating temporal lobe brain stimulation on one of his students. His contention was that we have a "God" spot in our brain. This area of our brain produces the numinous feelings of mysticism when we enter a church or pray. He wanted to demonstrate that it was a local brain effect by using an electromagnet taped to a helmet. This helmet was put onto the test subject in a darkened room. The test subject was wired to an EEG to monitor her brainwaves.

When the electromagnetic brain stimulation was started the girl started seeing images and entities and feeling numinous. This got me to thinking. In our future, our music and iPods have the potential of being the non-auditory kind. In other words, music of the future won't enter our brains through our ears, but rather directly into our brains by stimulating the right part with electro-magnetism.

This stimulation could be of two kinds. The first would be stimulation of memory to re-play songs that we have already heard. This would be like have a personal iPod with no actual musical storage equipment other than your brain.

The second kind of "new" music would be to stimulate the brain to produce pleasant harmonious music within itself, of the kind that you like. It would be a brain synthesizer and a heck of a new musical instruments.

I took violin lessons for five years, and judging by the amount of practice, I think if my violin music cortex were stimulated, you might get about 5 minutes worth of music.

The Translator Couch

When I traveled all through Siberia and Russia in 1992, I managed to pick up a novel by Arkady and Boris Strugatski. It was sort of a science fiction book called "Monday Begins on Saturday". It was an amazing piece of literature.

In the novel, the characters create all sorts of innovative things at a scientific institute in the old Soviet Union. One of their inventions was a translator couch. Two people who spoke different languages could sit on the couch and have a conversation could understand each other. The primary character of the story fell asleep on the couch, and he heard hundreds of voices that awoke him when the couch began to translate his dreams into almost every known language.

The book was written close to thirty years ago, and when I read it, it seemed like it was a droll piece of humour. I was wrong. The Strugatski brothers (who are twins and both astrophysicists) were predicting the future. Our furniture in the future will not be there just to support our bodies and stuff to keep them off the floor. It will be multi-functional, multi-purpose and intelligent furniture.

The furniture will recognize who is sitting in the chair, by weight and bio-metrics, and depending on the time and day of the week, will turn on the entertainment, or dim the lights or whatever. The thing to watch for, is when the wife programs the Lazy Boy to kick the husband out of it to do chores. That is when the future won't be fun any more.

Floor Coverings Coming

You won't recognize conventional floors of the future. We are already starting to get a glimpse of what can be done. The first intimation of the future of flooring came in the movie Saturday Night Fever, where John Travolta strutted his stuff on a dynamic disco floor that was out of this world. Lights flashed and patterns changed on the floor and we were all dazzled.

Take a look at the left hide side of the above picture. It is of the carpeting of a ballroom floor in a hotel in Texas. The carpet is patterned to create an optical illusion to make it look like there are waves in the floor. Apparently, it is quite the sensation to dance on.

The changes to flooring will be dramatic. With the touch a button, patterns will change, colour will change, and even texture will change. It will go from a soft carpet to a surface on which you can putt a golf ball. You can even program it, so that if you bring a woman to your apartment for a dinner date, the floor gets softer as the evening progresses.

The flooring of the future will also change our behaviour. For example if you dial in a shag rug, when you are lying drunk on the floor, you can hold on to something. You got to marvel at modern progress.

Piezo Electricity -- Power From the Roads

The first time that I heard of piezoelectricity was when my brother did a science project on it many years ago. Piezoelectricity converts mechanical action like pressure into electricity. If you have ever used a built in sparker to light a gas barbecue, you have used piezoelectricity.

Essentially, a piezoelectric transducer is made by cementing thin sheets of crystal like quartz between thin metal plates. The metal plates are hooked up to electrodes to capture the electricity given off when the transducer is subjected to any kind of mechanical force or stress. These transducers were used in sonar, in microphones and in all sorts of applications including ultrasound.

They also could be used to generate electricity on our roadways. With the amount of heavy trucks rolling down the highway, piezoelectric transducers could be embedded in the pavement surfaces and every passing vehicle would generate electricity by it weight rolling over the transducers. This is an ideas whose time has come.

Young people get a real charge out of driving. It's an electric feeling. We should be collecting and monetizing that electricity.

Rugby Metrics -- The Time Has Come -- The Future of Rugby

It's not often that I post about my own putative contributions to futurism, and my endeavours, but this time I will. This is about creating new knowledge about the sport of rugby using advanced technology and mathematics.

Moneyball. It all began when Michael Lewis, a statistics nerd and financial journalist, met up with Billy Beane, the general manager of the Oakland A’s baseball club, and Bill James, the team statistician. Beane had been given the task of turning the club around and making it competitive. He was disadvantaged in many ways but his primary disadvantage was a lack of money. In professional sports, money fuels the competitiveness of a team by providing the
means to bid and compete for top players coming into the game or for those coming up for free agency. Beane ran a team with total salaries of approximately $40 million while teams like the New York Yankees spent $125 million per annum on salaries alone. Unable to compete in such a disadvantaged revenue situation, Beane, with the help of Lewis and James, decided to try another approach.

The trio postulated that the collective wisdom of game insiders (including players, managers, coaches, scouts, and the front office) was subjective and often flawed. This body of information had been used to develop baseball statistics and the trio considered the content of the statistics and the methodology of determining them to be relics of a 19th century view of the game. So, Lewis, Beane, and James decided to radically dispense with subjectivity in favour
of objectivity, and in doing so, spawned the concept of Sabermetrics.

Sabermetrics is now a feature of every professional team in North America. Sabermetrics involves taking all of the statistics in the sport and using data mining and statistical analysis, one determines the exact factors in a winning team.

For example, conventional wisdom said that a young pitcher with a blistering fastball was the key to winning baseball games. As it turns out, any pitcher with a higher than average number of ground-outs is worth more than a 100 mph fastball pitcher who throws a lot of home runs.

Advanced statistical analysis and information theory allows one to determine what is really a significant statistic for success. It is about time that this happened for the sport of rugby, and I am the person doing it.

I was in discussion with one of the owners of a premiership rugby team in the UK, and both of us agreed that the sport of rugby was ready to "tip" worldwide. We used the word tip in the sense of Malcolm Gladwell's "Tipping Point" where rugby would become the rage, in vogue and very popular. Rugby metrics will contribute to that tipping point. That and the fact that in civilised society, the last venue for warfare and blood and guts, is on the rugby field.

Risk Analyzer -- Guardian Angel

In our brave new world of the future, constant connectivity to the Internet will allow us to do all sorts of things. Search engines like Google will allow us to have the world's wisdom at our finger tips. With this in mind, a new killer app of the future will be our risk analyzer.

This application will run on iPhones or Blackberries. With the Sensory Internet (see previous entry), it will know what we are up to, and what we are currently doing. Using Bayesian inference, it will determine the risk of our activity and notify us if the risk is large. It will keep us on our toes.

Something simple like this will save lives and prevent stupidity. The only annoying thing will be the beeping when a married man is talking to an attractive woman.

The Internet of Things

Not so long ago, I thought that I had an original idea. I had been designing micro-payment systems based on RFID or Radio Frequency ID chips. I got the bright idea that if everything had an RFID tag, then it would be identifiable and one could google it. You would have an internet of things, instead of just web pages. A couple of days ago, I saw that the Chinese are trying to do this in Shanghai and beat the world on this idea.

It would be an amazing concept. A PDA (personal digital assistant) or iPhone would have an RFID reader just like the one pictured in the upper left above. As you passed a tavern or a bar, you could google it automagically to check out the ambiance. You pass a utility pole with a tag on it. It would tell you what utilities it carried. In the grocery store, you google the apples to find out where they were grown and when they were picked.

The meat that you eat would have a tag, and you would know the cow's name and where it was raised. If you pass a snazzy car, it would tell you how many horsepower it has and how fast it goes. A picture frame has a tag on it, and you could Google the identities of the people in the picture.

Everything from the Eiffel Tower to specially engineered insects that eat other noxious insects would have a tag that you could Google. It would be much more fun surfing the internet of things when you go out for a drive.

With the internet of things, people could even Google your location. Although if they see you are on Facebook, it would be unnecessary because they would know that you are at work.

Celebrity DNA For Sale

As a futurist, I see the lines on ethics and reproductive technology becoming blurred as we progress. We will eventually arrive at the day, when we have a DNA auction like e-Bay.

Suppose you are a childless mother and your ovaries are aching and you want a baby. But you don't want just any old baby. Andy you don't even want a genetically-engineered blue-eyed blonde baby. Suppose you are a young woman who adores Justin Bieber, and you want his baby.

You click on the DNA exchange, and buy his DNA. Your doctor modifies one of the mothers ovum, injects it with the celebrity DNA and implants in it her uterus. The celebrity pockets a cool $25,000 each time this happens.

Of course, the celebrities will have to watch out for fans pulling off a strand of their hair and sending it to a lab to isolate the DNA, and surreptitiously copy it.

It will be an interesting time. You can tell the age of a person by who he or she looks like. Where is this all going to lead? Myself, I think that it will lead the human race dumbing down. Imagine a whole generation of androgynous Justin Biebers walking around.

Sewers Re-Visited

The way we handle sewage will seem quaint in the future. Right now, all of the toilets in a city are interconnected by a vast sewage system. We ship shit miles. It is a crazy crap circuit. The subway of shit is ridiculously expensive. The sultan of smell is the foundation of our cities. We build large infrastructure to handle enormous amounts of excreta. The underbelly of our cities are full of arteries of crap. Nothing has changed since the ancient Romans invented this system.

The current sewage system does not work very well. Although a lot of the bacteria is gone from treated sewage when it is returned to the water system of rivers and lakes, there is still a lot of pollutants. Treated water from sewage has a whole pharmaceutical cornucopia of prescription drugs that pass through our bodies and into our lakes.

With so many people taking birth control pills, estrogen level in lakes is increasing, affecting the reproductive ability of fish. Phosphates from soaps fertilize lakes and turn them into algae cesspools. And there are thousands of other compounds that are concentrated by sewage systems and released into the ecosystem. Solid matter from sewage treatment plants used as fertilizers is so laden with chemicals, that it actually kills earthworms in the soil. There has got to be a better way. And there is.

Technology will come to the rescue. Each dwelling, be it house or apartment or public building with have its own sewage treatment system. Solid waste will get the methane taken out and shunted to a fuel cell to produce energy. That energy will be used to recover the water through reverse osmosis making it completely pure.

The left over solids and chemical compounds will use some of the energy created from the methane recovery to denature organic compounds like pharmaceuticals to render them harmless. The solids then will be treated for chemical recovery and recycling and the truly organic matter left over will be composted with a cocktail of genetically modified bacteria to digest it and make it safe.

The technology for a better, less expensive sewage system is already in place, but large corporations would rather do research on creating a better Viagra than by solving everyday problems. There is more money in sex than there is in crap.

The Future of Lotteries

I was in the Philadelphia airport and I saw this unattended lottery kiosk. I could buy a Power Ball, Mega Millions, Three Number, Four Number or Five Number early or late drawings. The kiosk accepted cash on the spot.

I immediately realized that with a connected world, lotteries of the future would be much like this. You would go up to the kiosk, put your money in and get a ticket. The big difference, is that with players from around the world, you could have a draw every five minutes for millions of dollars. Lotteries will become instant.

You could also participate in lotteries on the death of a celebrity (like betting on the death date of Zsa Zsa Gabor), or the wheat crop in Canada, or just about anything. Waiting a week for the draw will be passe.

New forms of lotteries will come out that are micro lotteries with very good chances of winning small amounts if you play it often.

The hallmark of lotteries of the future is instant gratification. If you lose, you can play again until you run out of money.

The gambling urge is very basic to human beings, and it will always be around. As a matter of fact, the oldest profession is prostitution. Gambling is a close second.

Mindless Entertainment

When you are bored and in need of mindless entertainment, sometimes you turn on the TV. It is quite an inefficient way to entertain yourself and stimulate your brain away from boredom.

You actually have to watch a TV show. The images travel from the retina to the optic nerve to the image processing center of the brain. From there you decipher the images, infer the content, react to the contact and produce the brain chemicals that makes you unbored.

As they say "candy is dandy but liquor is quicker". Our future will find a quicker way to entertain you. One will don an entertainment helmet studded with electrodes. Then one dials in the firmware that stimulates the brain for laughter, happiness, nostalgia or whatever. You could have a comedy show without the comedy, rife with laughter.

I am sure that iTunes will have downloadable programs for brain stimulation. What will make it interesting, is if the program had a virus. This will take brain drain to a whole new level.

The Future Of Tattoos

As much as I hate tattoos, they are here to stay. And tattoos will go high-tech. One of the most probable ways, is that the tattoo artist will work from a keyboard.

Getting a tattoo will involved using a needle to embed microscopic liquid crystal diode threads under your skin. Instead of embedded tattoo ink as they do now, you will get a display LCD thread under your skin.

The LCD threads are displays like laptop displays, and you can put in a picture to be displayed on the threads. The threads will behave like a raster image (in old non-digital TVs, the tube painted the picture in lines called raster lines. The image was made up of a series of lines that were dynamically updated every 30th of a second. That is why TV screens flicker when they are on the TV themselves. The raster scans are out of sync.).

So with a rasterized tattoo, eventually you will get tattoos that are animations, or movies. Yippee, I can hardly wait. (Sarcasm off!). The next thing you will see, is playboys playing porn on their tattoos.

In the meantime, before this feature of the future arrives, I am still trying to get the animated picture to work at the top of this blog entry. It is supposed to be a spinning tattoo, but no dice. I can't figure out why it won't animate and spin.

Carry-on Luggage Solution

In the not-too-distant future, airlines will ban carry-on luggage. It is the most inefficient operation in loading and unloading an airplane of its human cargo. Carbon life forms of the homo sapien kind are not very good at efficiency and organization. And when they get on an airplane seat, they go through some kind of nesting behaviour where it takes them a while to settle in, get their luggage stowed, and get into their seat.

Carry-on luggage was a way of utilizing some of the overhead cabin space. The future will see a much more efficient utilization of that space in aircraft design. Instead of humans handling carry-on baggage, let machines do it.

In the very near future, you will see a conveyor-loader system where you place your carry-on on the belt, and it automatically gets stowed in the overhead compartments. And you will not have access to it during the flight. This will significantly speed up aircraft loading.

Come to think of it, I have a better idea. What if people were loaded by conveyor belt. The seats would pop out on rollers like a roller coaster. Everyone hops into their seat from all sides, and then the whole thing is rolled into the plane. With these two systems, boarding would take three minutes.

I also would like to be a designer for the carry-on luggage conveyor system. I would build in a special feature. Now, some passengers try to pass off a steamer trunk as carry-on. On my system, if the carry-on is over-sized or overweight, it gets shunted off to a shredder. That would make people obey the rules. If this is the future of automation, I am all for it.

The New E-Driver's License, Health Insurance Card, etc

Picture this. In the not too distant future, a cop pulls you over because your are speeding. (In Arizona, it would be because you look Mexican.) He asks you for ID, drivers license, vehicle ownership and proof of insurance. You take the above pictured fob off your key chain and hand it to the officer.

He sticks it into a USB port in his tablet. When it lights up, you touch the fingerprint sensor on the upper surface. Bingo. Your identity is verified by biometrics. Also, all of your information is accessed through various databases. You do have a valid driver's license, your insurance is up-to-date, and you do own the vehicle that you are driving. To make sure, the cop scans the RFID chip in the vehicle, and the VIN number checks out with the information in your USB identity device.

Gone are the days when ID can be faked on a piece of paper. It is going to cost you some real coin in hardware, programming and engineering if you want fake ID. This same device will be used to verify that you are of the legal drinking age in bars, and that you have a certificate to possess medical marijuana.

The best thing about this electronic ID, is that it will save the states, especially California, millions in photo id. Everytime someone has a facelift, liposuction, collagen injection, brow lift, nose job or whatever, they don't look like their photo id any more. Their fingerprints will never change.

The Touchy Feely Sensory Internet

A lot of people like the internet. Suppose the internet grew feelings and decided to like them back. It is a weird, intriguing and far-fetched idea, but not really. And, it is probably a place that we are moving towards.

More and more computing will be done in the cloud -- somewhere on the internet. Our connection to the internet will be at the appliance level. This means that it will be a small device without a lot of compute horsepower. All of the heavy lifting in terms of processing cycles will be done on the internet. The appliance will behave more like a TV than a computer.

In the meantime, the internet is getting smarter and smarter about knowing you. Almost every website that you go to, tracks who you are, what you are reading on the internet, and what your likes and dislikes are. The reason that this is already happening is so that ads can be targeted at you you, that have a decent chance of you clicking on them.

If you take this to the nth degree, the internet will soon be able to recognize you when you sit down to surf the web, or do whatever you do on the internet.

The second major piece to the emotional, sensory component of the internet, is the sentient computer software bot that recognizes emotions. Why would these be developed? Simple. E-Commerce. Customer service agents on the web will be computerized software bots that will be able to recognize human emotion, and respond appropriately to it. They will be able to sooth and calm angry customers. And they are a lot cheaper than having human operators sit at computers 24 hours a day waiting for complaints.

It will be a short step to combine the knowledge that the internet knows about you with a sentient, emotional computer robot to make the emotionally sensory internet. For some people, the internet will be their first and last emotional interaction of the day. This will alleviate human loneliness, and many many people will jump on it. Perhaps emotional interaction with the internet will be more satisfying than emotional interactions with humans. The ego won't get in the way.

The real question is whether or not humans will care if the emotions are computer generated or come from the brain of a human being. I am guessing that they won't. After all, I am a regular man, and I don't care if women today fake it on any scale-- I just don't want to know. I will continue to believe that they don't.

Why Buy Paint?

Paint stores will be drastically affected by the future, because the nature of the walls in houses will change. The walls will become either electronic or electro-mechanical.

In the electro-mechanical version, the walls are a series of panels that have a capillary system built in. You can change colour at the touch of a button. When you do, a different colour dye is pumped into the capillaries, and almost instantly you can change the mood and colour of the room.

In the electronic version, the walls can display any blank colour, or they can display your photos or murals. You can have custom graphics done in programs like photoshop for specific occasions (Happy Birthday comes to mind).

Rooms can be jungle rooms, or seaside rooms, or peaceful blue or disco orange. You can change the room depending on mood and circumstance. If you are having a big party, you could even make a few bucks by selling the advertising space on your walls.

This change in wall material will change the world of graffiti as well. Someone will come up with an iPhone to text graffiti onto the walls in public washrooms. This will add a whole new dimension to bathroom-wall limericks. I am still trying to think of a rhyme with:

Here I sit and try to text .... ..... ..

Data Wrappers

One of the biggest problems with data is that it is quite useless without an application to do something with it. When we get a file, we rely on it's file extension to tell us what it is. For example, when we see .jpg, we know that we can expect to see a picture.

This is quite inefficient. For example, data on a Mac is usually not transferable to data on a PC unless we have appropriate programs on both ends.

What the world needs is an innovative new data structure. This would be a wrapper on the outside of sort of a universal envelope. The envelope will tell us what is inside, who sent it, who created it, when it was last modified, and it self-executes. This means that it can display itself on any computer without a program.

The wrapper could be so configured that it would be impossible to hide a virus inside the data. And when you pop this data into a database, it is self-sorting because it knows about itself.

New data handling methods are going to be required, because our ability to generate data is outstripping our ability to handle it. The only thing growing faster than the amount of data we generate, is the amount of bullshit that politicians spew. And that isn't worth storing.

Daily Bread

Bread makers as we know them, are going to be toast. They are just two inefficient. They make a whole loaf that will go stale before you can eat it. And you are pretty much stuck making one kind of bread unless you get a lot of different kinds of flour and ingredients.

The bread maker of the future, will in fact be a slice maker rather than a bread maker. It will make any quantity on demand. It will also be super smart.

You can have one slice with white bread, but up the protein level by two or three percent, and dial down the carbs. The second slice will have a crispy crust. The third slice will be rye bread. You will be able to control the protein, carbohydrate and moisture levels.

The slice maker will be connected to the computer monitoring your biometrics, so any extra nutritional needs will be automagically added.

I guarantee that these new machines will be incredible popular. They will be the best thing since sliced bread. Come to think of it, they .. make sliced .. oh never mind!

No More Vitamin Pills

I vividly remember the days that my mother used to jam a vitamin pill into my mouth when I was a kid. It was an evil tasting thing with a chemical aftertaste that lasted hours. And you would burp up the horrible remnants of it throughout the day. The only good thing about it, was that an hour later, your pee would be an incredible fluorescent yellow. A boy was easily amused by coloured pee.

In the future, taking vitamins will be much different. Instead of taking a pill jammed with every single vitamin known to mankind in amounts that would raise an earthworm from the dead, smart electronics will determine exactly what you need.

You will put your finger up to a sensor, and your present vitamin needs will be analyzed. The appropriate vitamin cocktail will be dispensed into your cup of coffee, and you are good to go!

The kiddies version will contain florescent dyes so that little boys will be glad to take their vitamins just for the coloured pee.